How to Write Articles With Stupid Keywords
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One of the main tools I have been using this year to try to make a few extra bucks has been sponsored posts, mostly using services like PayPerPost. The problem with services like this is that it requires you to use certain keywords. If you don't, you will not get paid.
I get the feeling that whoever places these advertisements have no freaking clue how to write a coherent paragraph.
For example, this came from my last post:
Fortunately, the boss is a fair, kind man who decided to call it a lay-off rather than a ‘get out’, so even though I was only with the company for two months, he is willing to give me a good reference, as well as some photos of rhinoplasty. Strange man, I’m not sure if he was trying to tell me that I needed a nose job, or if I just needed to get my nose worked on. Maybe I snored when I was at work. I wonder what I’d look like…
There is no way in heck that I can logically use the key phrase 'photos of rhinoplasty' on this site without doing some idiotic, illogical rambling...just like that.
Another problem is that I tried to use keywords that consisted of a person's name. It was rejected 3 times because I have to have a few sentences that are directly related to the keyword. I don't know the guy, and would not be likely to write about him on this site. I may have to try to work it in soon, if I want to get paid, which is a good thing. Of course, it's just the hassle that makes me want to just pour Mountain Dew on my monitor. Good thing I am patient. It's also good that I don't have any Mountain Dew.
I'm willing to bet that there are quite a few of you out there that have had this dilemma in the past. How can I write good posts while inserting totally unrealistic keywords?
My only solution is to just get insane with your topics. Hey, I could use the extra few bucks.
I'd like to hear from anyone who has come up with a creative solution to this problem. Sound off!
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eBay Irony
I was looking through the eBay listings for people selling lead (yes, like the stuff that makes toys taste better), and I found this interesting (and revealing) bit of text:
IF YOU CAN'T READ. GET SOMEONE TO HELP YOU. U.S.A. SHIPPING ONLY YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.. YOU COST ME $14.64 THANK YOU.
I just found this ironic. Perhaps the person who wrote this had been licking the pans in which the lead had been melted down.
(You can click the text to see the actual listing.)
If you like these posts and want to stay in the loop, please subscribe to my RSS feed and follow me on Twitter. And if you really like this stuff, you can buy me a coffee! Oh, and if you like being an insider, be sure to join the mailing list...I never spam, but you will get some insider specials!
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